Life can be busy and sometimes a bit overwhelming. The past month or so has been that way for me. Ryan has been working a lot, which I am very grateful for, but without him not around as much as usual life has been a bit hectic. Or maybe I just think it is hectic when I am here with three energetic kids all day long, who won't keep their hands off of each other, a house which always needs a little TLC and a list of never ending chores.

A few weeks ago I kinda "lost" it. (as some of you may have read on facebook) It was a Saturday afternoon, I had to work that night, Ryan had to run basketball, I was exhausted from the week before and well... I guess you could say I had a bit of a melt down. I was on my way to work, pretty much ranting and raving to myself about how irritated I was about life at the moment. (Plus I didn't have time to eat which will just about throw this gal over the edge sometimes:) I would say that I'm typically a pretty easy going person and can usually just go with the flow but for some reason I hit a wall. I drove all the way down Pacific Coast Highway complaining to myself.

I got to work, still in a bad mood and got my assignment of patients to care for that evening. I headed out to get report from the off going nurse. It didn't take more than 3 minutes when my overwhelming bad attitude was overcome with a wave of gratitude. (and a bit of guilt)

I'm sure I have said it before. Being an intensive care nurse is not always glamours or fun or even happy sometimes. I can say one thing however... It always brings me back to reality and makes me grateful. I made a few resolutions to myself at the start of the new year and one of those was to be more grateful for what I do have and to appreciate what life has given me, family, friends, a home etc. Unfortunately I forget things easily and sometimes need a little slap on the face per say.

How could I be complaining about having lots of time to spend with my three wonderful little boys, or that my husband wasn't around as much as I would like him to be. Life could be so much worse. My young husband could be inflicted with a life threatening brain tumor who was functional and vibrant one day and lying in a hospital bed unable to speak or move and having continuous seizures several days later. I could be at his bedside day and night, unable to care for my children myself. I could be wondering if my best friend would ever wake up and trying to decide if I should allow my young children to come in to see their father, with tubes, IV's, lifeless and still because this could be their last chance to say goodbye.

My life could be so much worse. Yes my husband had been away from home more than usual, working hard to support our family. And yes he has to be gone EVERY Saturday afternoon/night. But I still have my husband and he is wonderful and healthy. I am able to be home with my kids a lot and for these reasons alone....

I am grateful.

Don't get me wrong now. I still get overwhelmed and irritated with life sometimes, it's only natural I believe. I am glad however to have a little kick in the rear now and again to remind me that my life isn't always "Rosie" but it is pretty darn good!