A Moment of Reflection

For some reason I have not "blogged" much about what I do for work, and honestly, I'm not really sure why. I have to say that I love my job as an Intensive Care Nurse. I truly believe that I was one of the best decisions I ever made. I love to learn something new. I am fascinated how the human body works and operates. I love the opportunity to challenge my brain. Don't get me wrong now, it does take amazing skill to figure out how to get a 9 month old to eat meats(which he won't) or how to talk a 2 year old out of a tantrum in the middle of the store or how to teach a 4yr old that homework is a good thing. However I love that I have to opportunity to throw something new into the mix every now and again. I realize that it may sound a bit disturbing to some, I'm sure, but I love to be involved in a "Code" situation. Yes, I am referring to the infamous "Code Blue". I know what you are thinking... weird right? Maybe it is something only a critical care nurse can understand, I'm not sure. It's not because a life is at risk but because I have the chance to try and figure out what could be the cause and fix it. (Critical thinking can be exhilarating!) I get asked frequently if it is hard to do what I do or if it is sad. To that I would say yes... and I would say no. I have been thinking a lot over the last month or so about my job and how it effects me. When I first began working in the ICU, after a particular sad event, I had another nurse tell me that it takes a special person to bring a life into this world and it takes a very special person to be there to let one go. I like to believe this is true. Do not get me wrong however. Although I experience great loss I also have the greatest opportunity to witness miracles. I have the chance to care for and recover people who have the greatest of odds against them. I have the chance to see lives changed forever, in a blink of a second, without warning, and people fight and overcome adversity. I have the opportunity to be a shoulder to cry on and a support to a family in limbo. It can be unbelievably rewarding. Just imagine how it must feel to night after night care for a patient and a family who have been dealt the smallest of odds. To care for a patient, as he is kept in a deep sleep, for days to allow his precious head to heal. To night after night experience the imaginable as he slowly begins to move a finger, then two and then lift an arm and follow commands. It is magical. To be able to see him wheeled out to the patio for the feel of fresh air after months of lying in a hospital bed and to see the tears in his young wife's eyes as she expresses her thanks for your care. To hear that he is fighting his way back to "normalcy"... It is unbelievable. (Read here for more of "his" story). In my six years as a nurse I have seen much. I have cared for the elderly, I have cared for the young, I have cared for brand new mothers, the wealthy, the poor, the happy and the saddest of people. I have held a 28week old baby in my arms as a woman cried for the loss of her first born son. I swaddled the sweet sacred infant and carried him to the morgue. I have sat and held hands with a man who woke from his sleep with a breathing tube and machine, no recollection of what happened and what his future foretold. I cherish every moment. So as I sit and reflect for a moment, I think about myself, my family, friends and loved ones. My job has made me a better person, a stronger person. It has taught me not to take advantage of anything nor anyone for anything can happen. I don't usually make New Year's resolutions but I hope that in 2009 I will remember to take just a minute each day to think about what I am so grateful for and to appreciate others and life just a little bit more.