Circus at the Dr.'s office

Tav, the "super human" little boy- post shots

Have you ever seen the circus come through your Dr.'s office?

Let me tell you a story. (Although I would rather just forget this whole day even happened, it's just one of those things that has to go down in the records.)

In preparing to get the kids ready for school we had to visit the Dr.'s office for our annual checkups and immunizations. I scheduled an appointment for Phearson and Tav on the same day at the same time to make things easier. I knew that both boys were going to need multiple shots this time around and intentionally make the appointment for 4:00 so that Ryan could come with me.

Well as thing go, Ryan had to work late and wasn't going to be able to go with me. "No biggie right". I figured that I could handle taking all 3 kids by myself. "They are older now, we were going to be seeing a new Dr. for the first time so they would be shy and behave... right? How difficult could this really be?" (That's my supermom complex talking. She gets a little ahead of herself sometimes)

Difficult wasn't even the word to describe that days events. It was a circus.

Let me run you through the chain of events.

We arrive at the Dr.'s office. Mom and three little boys. The kids look at the fish and then take a seat.... the usual.

I am asked to fill out and sign, what seems like 50 new patient information pages (ok so maybe only 4 per child but geeze!) while we wait.

Tav needed to use the bathroom (of course at the most inconvenient times) so I tell Porter and Phearson to say in their chairs and play their Nintendos while I take him. Only 1/2 page into the paperwork so far.

I hear the nurse call our names from the bathroom so we hurry up and wash hands, grab the other boys and follow the nurse down the hall. We check heights, we stand on the scales and Phearson gets his first eye exam. Luckily Phearson had his big brother standing at his side whispering most of the answers to him because he was not too into it. (Hopefully the kid can actually see)

Everyone was cooperating and being very well behaved at this point. "I knew I could handle this!" I thought to myself.

We were taken to our room to wait for the Dr.

Then it all started. All of the sudden I smell something awful!! I look around the room and immediately ask "who farted!?" (because that is what you do with boys) Porter grins and the other boys giggle. I can't believe it! We quickly open the door for some fresh air hoping to rid the room of the stench before the Dr. comes in. (Did I mention that it was a new Dr. that we were meeting for the first time)

The boys continue to play musical chairs and fight over the Dr.'s stool, that twists and rolls around the room while I try quickly try and complete the information forms, digging through my wallet for insurance cards, ID and social security numbers. (Unfortunately I do not have them all memorized yet)

The sweet Dr. comes in shortly and introduces herself. I'm praying that the horrible smell has dissipated although at this point I can't tell. She starts in by asking the boys questions and starts giving us the "stats" on their heights and weights. Pretty much immediately the kids start acting silly.

I think that it might be a boy thing, but most recently Porter begins acting really silly in certain situations. Some of those being around new people and around females. I'm assuming that it is his way of "showing off" but frankly it is just weird, awkward and annoying. Of course his brothers look up to him and follow right in his footsteps... and unfortunately this day was no different. At one point as I was trying to answer the Dr.'s questions about how much "fruit and vegetables" vs "chips, candy, and soda" my children partake of when the Dr. stopped and asked me (with a very sympathetic smile) if it is always "SO Lively" at home to which I returned the smile and replied "yes, most of the time".

The rest of the visit was filled with kind requests from the Dr. to "settle down and follow directions" and bribes of ice cream and threats of telling their father of their naughty behavior from myself.

We managed to get through the questions and it was then time for the exams. Phearson went first and giggled the entire time. Hopefully he had clear breath sounds and no heart murmur because I'm pretty sure she couldn't hear a thing through her stethoscope. I was paying attention to him when suddenly from behind me I heard laughing.... lots of laughing. I casually glanced over my shoulder in the direction of Porter and Tav to see what was going on... only to be shocked by what my eyes were witnessing. Tav had a toy cow (they had a basket of books and big farm animals in the room for the kids to play with) in his hand, flipped upside down, SUCKING ON THE COWS UTTERS!!!! Needless to say I was MORTIFIED and the boys were equally entertained. I managed to quietly demand that he remove the cow from his mouth at once but of course the laughing and snickering continued.

We finally got through both exams and then it was time for the shots. I really don't know what I was thinking. 7 shots, 2 TB tests, one mom and three little boys.

Not really practical.

Phearson already knew he would be getting shots and started tearing up and stressing out the minute the Dr. left the room and told us the nurse would be back shortly. I figured Tav could go first since he had the least amount of shots to receive. I told him how brave and how strong he was and he agreed with me... until the nurse walked into the room with the syringes. He completely started freaking out.. of course. The nurse started with the TB test. I still had the situation under control, I thought, UNTIL... the thrashing, swinging, kicking, head butting, and screaming started. It didn't help that his two older brothers were standing over him, crying grimacing and moaning as the nurse started to administer the shot. I had to send Porter and Phearson out of the room to stand in the hallway while we finished the rest of the immunizations. We also had to get another nurse to come in to help hold my little 3 year old "Incredible Hulk" down. WOW!

I managed to calm the poor kid down and tell him how "incredible" and brave he had been just. Then it was out to the hallway with his big brother for him while Phearson had his turn.

At this point, as you can imaging, it was a task in it's self to even get Phearson back into the room. Then it was on to "Round Two".

It was crazy. Just as crazy as round one. Where do these children get this unbelievable strength? Luckily just as fast as it started it was over and everyone was happy again.

Thank goodness!

We also managed to leave some sort of urine sample (I won't even go there.. 3 little boys... peeing in a cup, you can only imagine) before grabbing a few suckers. I'm pretty sure that the rest of that office and all of the patients still waiting were left wandering what just went down in room 12.

Needless to say we all survived and are all that much healthier now. I left that office in a complete sweat, exhausted, embarrassed and feeling like I just completed a one man act in the circus.

Two words

NEVER AGAIN!

And I highly recommend you don't either.